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You get some sleep? My ocd follows me into my dreams!
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Cool. Mine is named Steve. Shut the fuck up, Steve.
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Dont forget the one where you literally stare qt the water for 5 minutes making sure its actually turned off
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this feels like a mental compulsion to me 😐 edit: replacing a “bad thought” with a “clean thought” to be clear
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Yes!!!! I always asked this in school and teachers would get so pissed!!! Its fucking school!
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Dude. I literally stopped in the middle of a sentence during a serious conversation with my husband && walked away because I got distracted & forgot I was talking. It was insane. Luckily he knows me well enough to know it wasn't on purpose but ooph that is what pushed me to get meds.
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Why is this specifically posted on the OCD sub-reddit? Is it a thing that typically happens for it? Sorry just a genuine question cause this happens to me VERY often as well.
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100% but I also think once I achieve a macro understanding I have an advantage over normies.
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Oh shit, thanks for thr reminder. Gonna go brush now.
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I tend to perform incredibly well when I can WRITE what it is I wish to express, especially regarding knowledge of specific subjects. If I have a reasonable amount of time to prepare, and "rehearse" what it is I need to verbalize I can do so with relative confidence. Put me on the spot and I'm a fucking disaster
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i had no idea other people have this problem. thanks for making me feel a little bit less isolated.
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Same thing I upvote a post or save a video thinking that I would watch it over again, but instead I forget the video or post exists
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I’m a 22 year old. Can definitely relate to this. The article tiles of “if your child...” or any pertaining to children is upsetting. I know that ADHD can be diagnosed early in childhood, I was! But, there has got to be more resources for adults with the condition. It honestly feels like once we stop being children we’re neglected for having ADHD.
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Why come you don't have a tattoo? But seriously, without people like us, Idiocracy would be here a lot sooner. Nobody knows why anymore.
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Has anyone seen those memes going around that are like " if im talking to you and you tell me a story about your life, were no longer friends because you made it about you. It doesnt make you relatable etc it just makes you an asshole" I fucking hate those.
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I was high functioning and high achieving all through my primary education, struggled a bit but got through my secondary education. Entered the corporate workforce at 28 as a legal assistant and promptly had my ass kicked. Lost my first law firm job as a result of not being able to take care of the boring admin tasks of my job. It’s gotten better since diagnosis 5 years ago, but I still struggle with the less-glamorous aspects of my job. Currently staring at a pile of billings I need to do and just have no interest in it.
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The amounts of times I've literally said "NO, I DIDN'T SAY THAT, YOU DID!" to my OCD "voice" over the years is insane. She be saying some fucked up shit trying to convince me it's my opinion or desire 🙄
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I’m feeling a little called out. Do you know me irl? Were you my masters thesis advisor? Or my English teacher? Or are you my dad?
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Wow! It’s perfect! I can feel the cold well portrayed in that gray sky. Perfect shades on trees as well. Well do e for walking away. I am proud of you!
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I'm in jrotc and have adhd, we were learning something that I had trouble with early on, I was a let 3, and a let 1(first year doing jrotc) was having trouble. The topic is one i relate to closely, your left and rights. Other people trying to teach tried to give them stuff to put into their right hand. I already know that doesn't work. She said she just can't, I broke it down into steps and she slowly learned the movement, later I asked them if they had adhd as that set off my "one of us" sense, and they said yes. I do not want to be the guy who puts people in stressful situations, especially ones I can relate to.
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Imagine saying this to a diabetic: "dont worry just produce your own insulin!". Same logic to me. So dumb.
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I've seen a lot of people in this thread recommend lists. It probably works for them but it isn't what I do. For me it feels like arguing against a brink wall. I had a whole system for reminding myself of the successes I've had on a particular day. However my brain would always jump onto, "why didn't you do the other thing?" It felt like no matter what, I would still feel like I wasn't productive. I could have actually been productive, remember being productive, but feel unproductive. It doesn't matter, no amount of productivity will make the thought go away, so it actually doesn't mean anything. ADHD brains come up with stupid nonsensical thoughts all the time, this one isn't any different because it says a certain thing. Despite this, the thought still exists, and you clearly want to deal with it better. A good experiment would be determine *why* it exists, instead of making it go away. Often I misunderstand what my thoughts really mean. In this case, it's interesting that the thought happens every evening. That doesn't make sense, if you were actually unproductive you know at the time, it might be hard to do the thing, but you know. So the thought might not be related to productivity at all. To figure this out I tracked those types of thoughts and whether I was actually productive, and when the thought occurs. I set an alarm for when it occurred and asked myself the question the next day. Turned out for me that the best predicator of when the thought would arise was not how productive I was, but when I took my meds in the morning. It always occurred 10 hours after, when their effects started getting lower. So for me, it occurred due to low dopamine and nothing else, it sometimes makes me sad, but I think that is to help me sleep so I'm okay with that. The best fix for me is to have a coffee because all those types of thoughts are really doing is making you anxious due to low dopamine. What works for me might not work for everyone of course, but trying to figure out why the thoughts exists first, instead of trying to destroy it immediately can help a lot. I also want to add on a quite meta level I got the thought writing this and will now get a coffee.
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ME right now. Honestly I've been crying a lot lately at even the smallest criticism. I'm not trying to mess up :'(
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yeah isnt this how erp works, just "agreeing " with your intrusive thoughts so they shut up
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Prozac 20mg but I'm 5 weeks in and this shit seems to have stopped working
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not lying that I have chills..truly thank you for your candor & care..xo
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3 is my number. I usually have to do things three times but sometimes I get anxious that I didn't do something enough times to correlate with the amount of people in my family so the number can change.
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This explains so much and explains why I would literally get ER-level sick by the end of each academic term. I would go to my doctors and they would be able to see actual inflammation on the MRI scan! However, it was a mystery to a lot of doctors until one speculated that it might be due to the adrenaline-rush wearing off by the end of each semester and that I had just not realized that the inflammation kept getting worse and worse :0
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I am not a slow poke!!! Says angry 33 year old me to my gr 1 teacher.
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Congrats! I’m in a similar spot. Terrible habits until I started keeping a calendar on the bathroom wall and checking off days that I brushed. Since roommates and guests can see it, I now have sufficient “motivation” to remember!
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Why is it that every time you are by yourself, you can identity and can remember the symptoms. But the moment you have to describe what’s happening, they disappear? (This happens to me, not sure if it happens to others)
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Heyo. I like your beard. To me, reality is relative- and honestly what I'm experiencing is real enough. Pain, Happiness, Apathy- emotions that remind me that I am here, and I am existing, and I will continue to exist.
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It doesn't work if you're not allowed to use electronic devices normally in class if the teacher didn't book school ipads for e learning that day
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Every day. I wonder when I'll be relieved from the pain? Forgiving myself... It's a challenge.
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i am probably the messiest person i know aha, everyone thinks i’d be really neat and organised because i have ocd but then they see my room and think ‘wow’ lol
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It's like if somebody was always inside your head and that person was the worst fault-finding asshole you've ever met
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Haha I needed this message right now. My toddler has been waking up (ear infection) and it’s late... I should be trying to sleep.
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I have a cleaner but I still haven't managed to convince my wife I need a gardener too...she thinks our garden is too small to justify it but I just can't maintain the damn thing!
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Hahaha. So. True. I hyperfixated on Bad Guy and You Should See Me in a Crown by Billie Eilish and I mean I don't hate Billie Eilish but I much prefer alt rock like muse or perfect circle.
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Yeah, which ends up with a horrible coping mechanism where I just freeze...and don't move.
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I'll be in the middle of something and go, "it can't be that hard to remember to do that after I'm done with this particular task" and then never ever think about it again
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Bio-Chem student here. I had to drop out because O-chem *ruined* me. Was also taking anatomy and physiology when I found out I was OCD. I agree. Chemistry is the worst. Also, your smile is wonderful :)
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I'm glad I'm not the only one. A lot of family and friends around me have been saying "They're so OCD now" or "if they weren't OCD before they are now" and it drives me insane and it's all about hand washing and organizing like they're the only things related to OCD. Like they're actual compulsions and boy have I seen some people on this subreddit actually suffering their compulsions to hand-wash worse now lately and it infuriates me that people throw the term around like its cute. I've only known 2 other people with OCD in my life and both had hair plucking compulsions.
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I LOVE this! Very occulty vibes ✌️😇 curious, do you find the process of building repeating patterns into larger shapes particularly soothing? I ask because I have a similar habit - when bored or anxious, I really enjoy drawing this way, 'mandala' style where larger things grow together organically from many smaller things. I feel it's inherently meditative and immensely beneficial. And, you get this sick ass piece at the end! Can't wait to see more 😎
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Yup, I always ruled out ADHD as what was wrong with me, I was never the loud kid in class and did well in school (I just didn't study or do homework so I was always a B/C student). Just never felt like I could hit my potential. Honestly, just knowing is making a huge positive difference in my life. Being open and honest with my wife and co-workers is also making a HUGE difference in my life. Highly recommend and if they don't support you, it's your sign that you're just not where you belong yet.
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I can relate so much to this. The more I read posts from this community, the more I start to notice that Ive been struggling with ADHD all my goddamn life.
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That fucking inner monologue just doesnt know when to shut the hell up.
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It's good to have a community you can relate to but just remember that seeking reassurance is in itself a compulsion
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Wow, this post makes me feel so validated. Seriously. I schedule my therapy appts as early as I possibly can for the same reasons you mentioned! Hell, I had a 1:30pm optometrist appt today, and I was basically stuck 1) getting ready and 2) watching TV before it was time to leave! Didn't want to play a video game or start my laundry, didn't want to stop somewhere on the way - could only fixate on the appointment.
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100% did this as a kid - I was convinced that if I don’t say my please keep everyone alive prayers before falling asleep some serious shit will go down...
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Have you tried just "doing the thing"? It works every time!
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Haha. Yep. I’m currently in the process of trying to educate my partner about what ADHD is — we’ve been dating for over 2 years, he still hadn’t even googled it until I confronted him about it about two months ago :) But all I can find online are articles about “So you think your partner might have ADHD.” “Are they constantly putting off chores? Unable to meet deadlines or follow-up on commitments? Can’t keep track of their obligations or appointments?” “Do you have to treat them like a child?” “If so, they might just have ADHD. You should encourage them to seek professional help, and work with them to feel like equal partners again :-)” Like sorry bro, I’M stuck in the parent role of this relationship, I’M the one doing the research, I’M the one that’s been receiving professional help for years, AND I’m the one with ADHD. Not all adults with ADHD act like children, so if someone could just write a decent fucking article explaining ADHD for an adult partner of an adult ADHDer without making a lot of baseless assumptions, that would be great. You don’t have to be neurotypical to fucking PERCEIVE relationships or ADHD. jfc.
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Careful guys, this reads like reassurance to me. I used to compulsively "check" that I still cared to prove that I wasn't an evil person. This led to compulsions like throwing up in response to thoughts because it "proved" that I cared about them.
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Yeah I have a morbid sense of humor about it as well. I usually tell people that know I have hit/run OCD that I ran over x amount of invisible people when I drive somewhere. THEY JUST KEEP JUMPING INTO MY CAR!!! WHY CAN NO ONE ELSE SEE THEM?! :D \*panic intensifies\*
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I agree that it can be seen as a cool connection to his own personal struggles with ADHD, but Jim Carrey just acted in these movies and didnt write or direct them. Since they were made by different people, it's unlikely that they are deliberately intended to mirror ADHD.
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lol yes! Going through them is fun, "Why the fuck did I take a picture of a receipt for $2 at the hardware store!?!"
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Yah me explaining to my mom I’m not in a loop then realizing an hour later I’m in a loop
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I'm 29. If someone would've told me 10 years ago, even 5 years ago, about what my life is like now, I would've laughed them off the face of the planet. I have changed so much, learned so many things, met so many wonderful people. I was plagued with anxiety and depression my whole life - my anxiety is nearly gone and depression holds a small presence now. Even if it wasn't, I've learned to love myself the way I am. So much can change in just a few years, whether it's external or internal, so hang in there. Despite how we feel about it, people with ADHD are incredibly resilient and determined. We are hard working, not lazy, and we keep going every day despite facing immense challenges. We all are uniquely accustomed to overcoming hardships. We can do this.
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I usually worry about me going insane and stabbing people. I fucking hate OCD.
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That’s the worst. It sends me into a doubt rumination. “Am I wrong?” “Did I overreact?” “ is there any other way to interpret this?” “I must be wrong. She didn’t reassure me.” “I’m terrible. I will never feel better” blah blah blah...
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I get you, I hate people saying that, there are people who are suffering with OCD, like me, I get intrusive thoughts almost all day, every day, I can't look at a cactus without thinking what it would feel like to grab it with my bare hand, its something terrible, even though there are some people with ocd of being clean, if you're clean, it doesn't mean you have OCD.
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Been trying to do something similar with a fish tank. Trying to just not let myself stress out that much about it
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At 39 I still deal with this problem. However, it's *not as bad* as it used to be. Part of it is practice. Part is likely due to an air of respect I produce. I listen to others, I do my *damnedest* to relate, and follow up with more listening. It's hard, but brief silence *on your part* will help you get your thoughts more in alignment while also showing respect to others. It will never be what you want it to be, and that's also okay. Owning up to mistakes ASAP, especially verbal slips, will help you immensely. Because one of the reasons you and everyone else has this issue, is people not listening to *you*. We grow into this behavior as a child, because we're kids and people generally don't care what kids have to say. But our brain at that time in our lives in firing on all cylinders and we're flying past the point of the conversation. It takes years of practice to overcome that impulsive behavior we learned as a kid. When we slow down, others will pay attention. But it's also uncomfortable, because it feels like a *fucking slog*. But, again, practice...and time. Additionally, certain conversational tricks can help you keep interject without it being a slight onto another, like simply asking to be allowed to interject! It's surprising what people will let you do if you ask. Or if you already have a solid relationship with the other conversationalist. Might as well add. We have an emotional dysregulation issue in our brains. So when we are emotionally aroused, we will often lose whatever filter we've established and let loose, often to embarrassment or some other undesirable outcome. Again, taking responsibility will help *other* people respect you more, and down the line they will listen to what you have to say, even if there's more words than necessary.
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ADHD folk cracking jokes about ADHD symptoms is grade A facetiousness also how did I get here
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Only one thing was missing for me.... being too distracted to pee
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Can someone explain to me why do you get angry when someone simply doesn't have the right understanding about a particular thing? Like I know this disorder is absolute hell because I go through it every second of every day but I couldn't care less about what other people that don't have it think it is like.
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I am literally taking a break as I type this right now from writing my Masters dissertation. Often, people ask me what it’s on. And I go into some kind of tangent trying to explain it because even though it makes sense to me, I know people will be confused. It’s *annoying* to say the least...
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Here is a VERY BIG KEY. You need to get the dopamine rolling. Do one task. Any task at all. It can be as simple as finally taking that empty glass from last months middle of the night water quest back to the kitchen and put it in the sink. Then you MUST acknowledge your success. Man, these feels like a gaming tutorial 😂 Achievement Unlocked: Slightly Less of a Slob! 100 pts! Then while you have the glass at the sink and your brain gets a little kick of “yay me!” - When you think “I should wash it while I am here.” Then do it. Again, you need to self acknowledge the success. And you should do it in a positive manner. “Hey, I brought here AND I washed it!? 200 pts me!” — You might notice that the momentum will build a little — Don’t let yourself get into “then I’ll do this, and this and this” - Because that’s when the fucking train derails, but since you washed the cup, you might as well wash that bowl and plate before it gets fuzzy. [Edit to add: You need to force yourself to focus on NOW. Only NOW. No future, no past… and if your squirrel brain pops up, reign it in. You CAN. It just takes practice] Take a couple of dishes out of the dishwasher and put them away [if you want to do all after that, feel free… if not, so what - you got a couple done]. If your brain goes “Oh! I’m on a roll… I should do that thing that I have been meaning to do but couldn’t!” - Follow it. And when you’re done, and I mean you’ve had enough of that for now… you’re done. But acknowledging and praising your own success REALLY helps. For me, Adderall makes all of this about 1000x easier — I must complete a task 30-45 min after taking my pill, and reap the benefits of the dopamine upswing… Accomplishment all day! And oddly, fall asleep at 9:30-10 within 5 minutes of my head hitting the pillow. If I start my day playing a lazy sandbox Xbox game where there is no accomplishment and ignore my morning tasks… No amount of Adderall will pick me out of the “naaaarrrr - Can’t do anything but what I’m doing”. ADHD Zombie Mode.
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The ammount of time a day I think by time im 50 I will have enough brain power to think of a new color
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I haven't had a diagnosis yet simply because I never believed that I could have ADD because I have very good focus. But ADHD and ADD runs in both sides of my family, so I thought to myself why not try half a pill of my sister's medicine. Most people in my family are telling me that I should try, because even though I'm a determined person, I'm a huge procrastinator. Surprisingly, I finally got to live a day of my life without getting overly motivated about something, and then in the end not pulling through with it. A day without finding something else to do and completely forgetting to do the task at hand because I haven't reminded myself of why I'm doing it in the first place. I just did the stuff that I knew I needed to do, like a neuro-normal person would. I'm getting my fucking diagnosis.
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Me with locks and the stove. Have to check the stove several times or most times turn off the breaker or else my brain convinces me i left it on and my cats and everyone in the apartment building are going to burn to death.
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Lockdown is absolutely horrible and we dont even know when its going to end.
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I always have a project going, but at the same time I’m starting my next one. Hours and hours and hours of researching methods, learning what supplies or tools to buy, finding ways to buy those supplies, watching tutorials and reading forum, but then spending more hours searching for the best prices on supplies. (As if I actually need pro materials for every new project ugh.) Then I get everything, I’m all set to start, and the thrill is over. I still do the project but lose interest before I ever actually fully complete it. I am an *almost* expert in so many things it’s ridiculous.
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The problem is a lot of us also have bad memory due to the adhd. So even though we can pay attention to everything good luck getting any details out of us.
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My husband says I'm doing my JD from Scrubs face because I always have a blank stare that is sometimes horrified
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But I don’t have OCD. Yet I’m all of these things by definition
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Hey I did everything today thank you very much! No really thank you! I appreciate it!
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Right now I may have to retake a class because I didn’t realize we had a meeting due the same day as the assignments and we were required to set it up two weeks in advance of the date everything for the course is due. For some reason. I just never bothered to even look at the course before today because things aren’t due for 5 more days.
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Lucky you didn't need a hyphen for rereading. It's a weird one that
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Did this all the time growing up. When I would call my friend asking if they could "play" they said they could come over in 2 hours. I was physically incapable of doing anything but wait until then
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I can’t even play pranks or tell white lies without feeling sick with guilt ;-; I feel that. I feel guilty for saying “hi” *ever so slightly* weirdly for days. Best of luck to both of us for the future!
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That's a good quote to remember. I have problems making decisions and then it makes me anxious. One thing that helps me is not to dither over anything that is unimportant. So what to wear, what to eat, shall I dust, shall I shop now or later. With all those things I don't negotiate with myself I just do the first decision I think of and stick to it no matter what. More important decisions, I don't think about at the time and tell myself I will sleep on it and decide the next day. Sometimes this works and I wake up knowing what the right decision is for these bigger more important things. Another quote that helps me with really important decisions is this, "If in doubt do nothing." This way maybe it will resolve on it's own without any action from me. And anyway it leaves me the choice to do 'something' later.
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Its a huge miracle I still have both airpods after two years!! I am sad now. I think I just jinxed it.
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I went into Burlington for the first time days ago and I still don't understand why I was so scared/nervous the whole time 😭😭
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It’s the worst when you’re doing it because your brain has tricked you into thinking of it as “self care” or a “break”....... smh
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Yeah my OCD causes fights between me and my partner. I care a whole lot about him. My therapist is not helpful at all. However i haven't got into fights with my partner lately because he is very patient with me, and recognises when my OCD anxiety flares up.
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There is nothing worse than having your brain stuck in neutral when there is something that needs to be done.
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Being bothered by that pie cutting has nothing to do with OCD. For many reasons. But first and foremost, who WOULDNT be bothered by that atrocity?
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The huge amount you consume informs what you produce. So you could make a case that what you produce is quality rather than quantity, as a selling point. That's one way of making it work.
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Is this an OCD thing???? What the fuck I'm learning so much about myself.
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I feel more confident that I am understood by someone who can empathize and not just sympathize. I've heard "we need more people with mental illness in psychology/psychiatry/therapy/etc." and the general idea makes sense to me. I can think of a few caveats, but I don't want to build a wall-o-text >.>;;; Regardless, I'd bet it is overall worth seeing if it is helpful. ​ And yea, seeing so many resources mostly be for children (well, their parents) is SO demoralizing. I haven't been officially diagnosed but I am all but sure this is ADHD. I'm relying on my support network and few discord servers for the morale boost/accountability I need right now. It would have been nicer to have been diagnosed as a kid or at least for me to be able to find resources for myself as an adult. grumble grumble
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ADHD is named for the symptoms that annoy neurotypical people, not the ones that actually make life difficult for us. It's a very bad name. Edit: Yes, poorly-worded comment. I didn't mean to dismiss the effects of hyperactivity and attention dysregulation; what I meant is that they're the most visible symptoms and people often reduce ADHD to just that when there's so much more, like executive dysfunction and emotional dysregulation.
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I always end up panicking about becoming a drug addict whenever I smoke weed to mitigate my OCD. It's very hard to win one sometimes.
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At this point I jump between numb and having a breakdown its exhausting
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God bless Sarah, and can she have a chat with my spouse?
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top 0.5% of Frank Ocean listeners but i swear to god i listened to Harry Styles ONLY for like months. honestly went out of my way to listen to frank only 2 of 3 times this year. i have over 131k minutes tho bc i just play music all the time. i dont think it counted by podcast time in that either bc that was 41k minutes and my music time is always high.
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This is why subtitles are a must. Even when you KNOW exactly what they said, but you just need to make sure lmao
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...thank you lmao. I was putting off going to sleep! I have to get up so early tomorrow. Closing Reddit now.
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I remember being in grade school and having these horrible and embarrassing thoughts. Like, darker than any 8 year old should ever have. I was super afraid, because I thought if I told someone about them, they'd get rid of me (a threat often used by my family). I was in 5th or 6th grade, and I finally told my mom that something just seemed wrong with me. During this time, she was in university and studying about mental health, I thought she'd get it. She didn't. She flipped out and yelled at me, said my mind was disgusting and that I should be ashamed of myself. She also said that she, "Didn't raise me to be like this." I felt deep guilt and embarrassment and it took me nearly 15 years before I finally was able to start getting the help I needed, but I kept it a secret for another few years. When I finally told my friends and family, they laughed and pointed out the fact that my room was always messy and therefore I'm "a hypochondriac looking for attention." I have been very vocal ever since, trying to spread awareness. I just want people to understand. There is so much more to this than the media portrays and I hate the media for giving us this reputation.
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Yeah. But, honestly, who cares if you’re good at it, right? Making art is just part of being human. It’s good to scratch that itch and just go through the process of making things for the sake of it. Even if you never show anyone. Even if it turns out stupid or ugly. Birds build nests, dogs dig holes and humans make art. It’s really sad that the idea of being “good at art” has been so commodified by capitalism that doing a basic human activity isn’t seen as a productive use of time unless you can get, well, a product out of it.
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