elapt1c/ElapticAI-512 · Datasets at Fast360

text stringlengths 0 149M
“‘And what are they worth?’ I asked.

“‘Oh, merely a couple of hundred a year, but the work is slight, and it
need not interfere very much with one’s other occupations.’

“Well, you can easily think that that made me prick up my ears, for the
business has not been over good for some years, and an extra couple of
hundred would have been very handy.

“‘Tell me all about it,’ said I.

“‘Well,’ said he, showing me the advertisement, ‘you can see for
yourself that the League has a vacancy, and there is the address where
you should apply for particulars. As far as I can make out, the League
was founded by an American millionaire, Ezekiah Hopkins, who was very
peculiar in his ways. He was himself red-headed, and he had a great
sympathy for all red-headed men; so, when he died, it was found that he
had left his enormous fortune in the hands of trustees, with
instructions to apply the interest to the providing of easy berths to
men whose hair is of that colour. From all I hear it is splendid pay
and very little to do.’

“‘But,’ said I, ‘there would be millions of red-headed men who would
apply.’

“‘Not so many as you might think,’ he answered. ‘You see it is really
confined to Londoners, and to grown men. This American had started from
London when he was young, and he wanted to do the old town a good turn.
Then, again, I have heard it is no use your applying if your hair is
light red, or dark red, or anything but real bright, blazing, fiery
red. Now, if you cared to apply, Mr. Wilson, you would just walk in;
but perhaps it would hardly be worth your while to put yourself out of
the way for the sake of a few hundred pounds.’

“Now, it is a fact, gentlemen, as you may see for yourselves, that my
hair is of a very full and rich tint, so that it seemed to me that if
there was to be any competition in the matter I stood as good a chance
as any man that I had ever met. Vincent Spaulding seemed to know so
much about it that I thought he might prove useful, so I just ordered
him to put up the shutters for the day and to come right away with me.
He was very willing to have a holiday, so we shut the business up and
started off for the address that was given us in the advertisement.

“I never hope to see such a sight as that again, Mr. Holmes. From
north, south, east, and west every man who had a shade of red in his
hair had tramped into the city to answer the advertisement. Fleet
Street was choked with red-headed folk, and Pope’s Court looked like a
coster’s orange barrow. I should not have thought there were so many in
the whole country as were brought together by that single
advertisement. Every shade of colour they were—straw, lemon, orange,
brick, Irish-setter, liver, clay; but, as Spaulding said, there were
not many who had the real vivid flame-coloured tint. When I saw how
many were waiting, I would have given it up in despair; but Spaulding
would not hear of it. How he did it I could not imagine, but he pushed
and pulled and butted until he got me through the crowd, and right up
to the steps which led to the office. There was a double stream upon
the stair, some going up in hope, and some coming back dejected; but we
wedged in as well as we could and soon found ourselves in the office.

“Your experience has been a most entertaining one, remarked Holmes as
his client paused and refreshed his memory with a huge pinch of snuff.
“Pray continue your very interesting statement.

“There was nothing in the office but a couple of wooden chairs and a
deal table, behind which sat a small man with a head that was even
redder than mine. He said a few words to each candidate as he came up,
and then he always managed to find some fault in them which would
disqualify them. Getting a vacancy did not seem to be such a very easy
matter, after all. However, when our turn came the little man was much
more favourable to me than to any of the others, and he closed the door
as we entered, so that he might have a private word with us.

“‘This is Mr. Jabez Wilson,’ said my assistant, ‘and he is willing to
fill a vacancy in the League.’

“‘And he is admirably suited for it,’ the other answered. ‘He has every
requirement. I cannot recall when I have seen anything so fine.’ He
took a step backward, cocked his head on one side, and gazed at my hair
until I felt quite bashful. Then suddenly he plunged forward, wrung my
hand, and congratulated me warmly on my success.

“‘It would be injustice to hesitate,’ said he. ‘You will, however, I am
sure, excuse me for taking an obvious precaution.’ With that he seized
my hair in both his hands, and tugged until I yelled with the pain.
‘There is water in your eyes,’ said he as he released me. ‘I perceive
that all is as it should be. But we have to be careful, for we have
twice been deceived by wigs and once by paint. I could tell you tales
of cobbler’s wax which would disgust you with human nature.’ He stepped
over to the window and shouted through it at the top of his voice that
the vacancy was filled. A groan of disappointment came up from below,
and the folk all trooped away in different directions until there was
not a red-head to be seen except my own and that of the manager.

“‘My name,’ said he, ‘is Mr. Duncan Ross, and I am myself one of the
pensioners upon the fund left by our noble benefactor. Are you a
married man, Mr. Wilson? Have you a family?’

“I answered that I had not.

“His face fell immediately.

“‘And what are they worth?’ I asked.

“‘Oh, merely a couple of hundred a year, but the work is slight, and it

need not interfere very much with one’s other occupations.’

“Well, you can easily think that that made me prick up my ears, for the

business has not been over good for some years, and an extra couple of

hundred would have been very handy.

“‘Tell me all about it,’ said I.

“‘Well,’ said he, showing me the advertisement, ‘you can see for

yourself that the League has a vacancy, and there is the address where

you should apply for particulars. As far as I can make out, the League

was founded by an American millionaire, Ezekiah Hopkins, who was very

peculiar in his ways. He was himself red-headed, and he had a great

sympathy for all red-headed men; so, when he died, it was found that he

had left his enormous fortune in the hands of trustees, with

instructions to apply the interest to the providing of easy berths to

men whose hair is of that colour. From all I hear it is splendid pay

and very little to do.’

“‘But,’ said I, ‘there would be millions of red-headed men who would

apply.’

“‘Not so many as you might think,’ he answered. ‘You see it is really

confined to Londoners, and to grown men. This American had started from

London when he was young, and he wanted to do the old town a good turn.

Then, again, I have heard it is no use your applying if your hair is

light red, or dark red, or anything but real bright, blazing, fiery

red. Now, if you cared to apply, Mr. Wilson, you would just walk in;

but perhaps it would hardly be worth your while to put yourself out of

the way for the sake of a few hundred pounds.’

“Now, it is a fact, gentlemen, as you may see for yourselves, that my

hair is of a very full and rich tint, so that it seemed to me that if

there was to be any competition in the matter I stood as good a chance

as any man that I had ever met. Vincent Spaulding seemed to know so

much about it that I thought he might prove useful, so I just ordered

him to put up the shutters for the day and to come right away with me.

He was very willing to have a holiday, so we shut the business up and

started off for the address that was given us in the advertisement.

“I never hope to see such a sight as that again, Mr. Holmes. From

north, south, east, and west every man who had a shade of red in his

hair had tramped into the city to answer the advertisement. Fleet

Street was choked with red-headed folk, and Pope’s Court looked like a

coster’s orange barrow. I should not have thought there were so many in

the whole country as were brought together by that single

advertisement. Every shade of colour they were—straw, lemon, orange,

brick, Irish-setter, liver, clay; but, as Spaulding said, there were

not many who had the real vivid flame-coloured tint. When I saw how

many were waiting, I would have given it up in despair; but Spaulding

would not hear of it. How he did it I could not imagine, but he pushed

and pulled and butted until he got me through the crowd, and right up

to the steps which led to the office. There was a double stream upon

the stair, some going up in hope, and some coming back dejected; but we

wedged in as well as we could and soon found ourselves in the office.

“Your experience has been a most entertaining one, remarked Holmes as

his client paused and refreshed his memory with a huge pinch of snuff.

“Pray continue your very interesting statement.

“There was nothing in the office but a couple of wooden chairs and a

deal table, behind which sat a small man with a head that was even

redder than mine. He said a few words to each candidate as he came up,

and then he always managed to find some fault in them which would

disqualify them. Getting a vacancy did not seem to be such a very easy

matter, after all. However, when our turn came the little man was much

more favourable to me than to any of the others, and he closed the door

as we entered, so that he might have a private word with us.

“‘This is Mr. Jabez Wilson,’ said my assistant, ‘and he is willing to

fill a vacancy in the League.’

“‘And he is admirably suited for it,’ the other answered. ‘He has every

requirement. I cannot recall when I have seen anything so fine.’ He

took a step backward, cocked his head on one side, and gazed at my hair

until I felt quite bashful. Then suddenly he plunged forward, wrung my

hand, and congratulated me warmly on my success.

“‘It would be injustice to hesitate,’ said he. ‘You will, however, I am

sure, excuse me for taking an obvious precaution.’ With that he seized

my hair in both his hands, and tugged until I yelled with the pain.

‘There is water in your eyes,’ said he as he released me. ‘I perceive

that all is as it should be. But we have to be careful, for we have

twice been deceived by wigs and once by paint. I could tell you tales

of cobbler’s wax which would disgust you with human nature.’ He stepped

over to the window and shouted through it at the top of his voice that

the vacancy was filled. A groan of disappointment came up from below,

and the folk all trooped away in different directions until there was

not a red-head to be seen except my own and that of the manager.

“‘My name,’ said he, ‘is Mr. Duncan Ross, and I am myself one of the

pensioners upon the fund left by our noble benefactor. Are you a

married man, Mr. Wilson? Have you a family?’

“I answered that I had not.

“His face fell immediately.