My last boyfriend was an amazingly convincing pathological liar. His ex was not, in fact, just a friend. And most of his business trips were not business trips. Our whole relationship was a lie. It just about wrecked me.  

I came into this new relationship kind of hesitantly, warning the guy about my past. I'm fine with my SO having female friends, but I recognize that I'm more likely to get jealous now than I was before. My boyfriend has been a complete delight, totally patient and willing to talk through anything with me.  

Unfortunately, my jealousy came to a head this weekend. I help run a cycling team, and I had recruited a new girl. She's lovely, and she's from the UK. I chatted with her a bit, but my boyfriend talked to her for quite a while. I had to remind him that we had to be somewhere.  

Today, he was asking me about her, and he texted me "That accent <3." He's never used a heart emoji or anything about me before. I just... I know it's so small, and so insignificant, but I feel sick to my stomach just thinking about it. I'm so jealous. And it brings back all of the self-blame from the last relationship. It makes me feel like I'm not good enough, and that's why no guy really wants to be with me. I'm just a placeholder.  

At this point, I'm kind of ready to throw this relationship away. I want someone who thinks I'm great, and why should I waste my time with someone who doesn't? But then again, that's an awfully strong reaction for just one text, right? I can't decide if I'm overreacting here.  

So. Yeah. One text, and I'm a mess, and I blame my ex. How do I get over my trust issues and jealousy and all of the residual bad feelings from my last relationship?
user
I'm jealous
assistant
My last boyfriend was an amazingly convincing pathological liar. His ex was not, in fact, just a friend. And most of his business trips were not business trips. Our whole relationship was a lie. It just about wrecked me.  

I came into this new relationship kind of hesitantly, warning the guy about my past. I'm fine with my SO having female friends, but I recognize that I'm more likely to get jealous now than I was before. My boyfriend has been a complete delight, totally patient and willing to talk through anything with me.  

Unfortunately, my jealousy came to a head this weekend. I help run a cycling team, and I had recruited a new girl. She's lovely, and she's from the UK. I chatted with her a bit, but my boyfriend talked to her for quite a while. I had to remind him that we had to be somewhere.  

Today, he was asking me about her, and he texted me "That accent <3." He's never used a heart emoji or anything about me before. I just... I know it's so small, and so insignificant, but I feel sick to my stomach just thinking about it. I'm so jealous. And it brings back all of the self-blame from the last relationship. It makes me feel like I'm not good enough, and that's why no guy really wants to be with me. I'm just a placeholder.  

At this point, I'm kind of ready to throw this relationship away. I want someone who thinks I'm great, and why should I waste my time with someone who doesn't? But then again, that's an awfully strong reaction for just one text, right? I can't decide if I'm overreacting here.  

So. Yeah. One text, and I'm a mess, and I blame my ex. How do I get over my trust issues and jealousy and all of the residual bad feelings from my last relationship?
user
Boyfriend texted
assistant