There I was, lying on my bed, minding my own business. My cat, Holly, was alternating playing in my room and bothering the other cats upstairs, where she had been when I last saw her. Apparently, I hadn't noticed her return to my until I smelled the god-awful odor of what can only be uncovered cat feces.

See, Holly's a bitch like that. She's the alpha cat in my group of four, so she NEVER covers it up, and I usually just scoop it out immediately after her smell permeates into my nostrils, but I was busy playing a game.

Now, for whatever reason, Holly is running rampant around the room, pausing, and going at it again repeatedly. This strikes me as odd, because there is much more room upstairs for her to "popcorn", and she never does it in my room anyways.

She stops her episode, jumps onto the bed next to me, and I look up at her from my laptop and see a small turd next to her. I thought to myself are you fucking kidding me? acting fast, I grab a plastic bag I had on the floor and go to pick it up. Except, woe and behold, it was still attached to her. Apparently, she had digested a long person's hair and it had managed to make her turd act like a dog on a leash. In horror, I get up and see that my bed has numerous streaks, and EVERYTHING in my room has in one way or another come into contact with Holly's excrement.

Seething, I tore the sheets off of my bed, threw them in the wash, put it on the hottest setting with plenty of bleach and detergent. Now Holly, who is never one to hang out with me, has not left my side since. I bet she feels really fucking proud of herself.
user
My cat smeared her shit on everything in my room.
assistant
There I was, lying on my bed, minding my own business. My cat, Holly, was alternating playing in my room and bothering the other cats upstairs, where she had been when I last saw her. Apparently, I hadn't noticed her return to my until I smelled the god-awful odor of what can only be uncovered cat feces.

See, Holly's a bitch like that. She's the alpha cat in my group of four, so she NEVER covers it up, and I usually just scoop it out immediately after her smell permeates into my nostrils, but I was busy playing a game.

Now, for whatever reason, Holly is running rampant around the room, pausing, and going at it again repeatedly. This strikes me as odd, because there is much more room upstairs for her to "popcorn", and she never does it in my room anyways.

She stops her episode, jumps onto the bed next to me, and I look up at her from my laptop and see a small turd next to her. I thought to myself are you fucking kidding me? acting fast, I grab a plastic bag I had on the floor and go to pick it up. Except, woe and behold, it was still attached to her. Apparently, she had digested a long person's hair and it had managed to make her turd act like a dog on a leash. In horror, I get up and see that my bed has numerous streaks, and EVERYTHING in my room has in one way or another come into contact with Holly's excrement.

Seething, I tore the sheets off of my bed, threw them in the wash, put it on the hottest setting with plenty of bleach and detergent. Now Holly, who is never one to hang out with me, has not left my side since. I bet she feels really fucking proud of herself.
user
Cat pooped on my bed, I threw away my dirty sheets and shit on everything else
assistant