I have been trying to sift through the minefield of my emotions after being sexually assaulted by a good friend a few weeks ago while intoxicated and would appreciate some guidance on where to start.

My boyfriend of a year is long distance with me across the country but we work for the same company. One of my immediate male coworkers is his close friend/mentor; my boyfriend looks up to this man extensively as a mentor and endeavors to emulate a lot of his qualities (relaxed, funny, great leader, successful). I have had always had attraction to this man because he is very very similar in personality to my boyfriend but more mature (older). Up until recently, I have been able to ignore it without issue.

A few weeks ago, my boyfriend broke up with me unexpectedly and after leaving me alone in a city I was not familiar with (I was visiting him across the country). I drank and stayed with a friend that night and was raped. That has left me extremely traumatized and anxious - however, my boyfriend has since apologize profusely and I understand his reasoning and that he was jumping the gun on a break up and we are back together.

My problem is that now I have a gap in the trust I have for my boyfriend despite my love for him - and his mentor is filling that gap in my thoughts and occupying all of my thoughts. I intuit that this mentor has feelings for me but can't be sure - which makes it all the more difficult to endure. The mentor drags on conversations with me when we work together, smiles at me, teases me, touches my hand/arm, remembers all the little things I say... all obvious signs of flirting. Unfortunately, this makes me smile and laugh when almost nothing else is following my trauma. 

I am concerned that either a) my emotions have been messed with recent events, b) I have lost the ability to trust my boyfriend and my feelings for this other man are real, c) I cannot hide from these new emotions given my proximity to this new man and his (presumed) feelings toward me. I'd appreciate some suggestions.
user
Loving boyfriend had a lapse in judgment and broke up with me, I was raped, I have
assistant
I have been trying to sift through the minefield of my emotions after being sexually assaulted by a good friend a few weeks ago while intoxicated and would appreciate some guidance on where to start.

My boyfriend of a year is long distance with me across the country but we work for the same company. One of my immediate male coworkers is his close friend/mentor; my boyfriend looks up to this man extensively as a mentor and endeavors to emulate a lot of his qualities (relaxed, funny, great leader, successful). I have had always had attraction to this man because he is very very similar in personality to my boyfriend but more mature (older). Up until recently, I have been able to ignore it without issue.

A few weeks ago, my boyfriend broke up with me unexpectedly and after leaving me alone in a city I was not familiar with (I was visiting him across the country). I drank and stayed with a friend that night and was raped. That has left me extremely traumatized and anxious - however, my boyfriend has since apologize profusely and I understand his reasoning and that he was jumping the gun on a break up and we are back together.

My problem is that now I have a gap in the trust I have for my boyfriend despite my love for him - and his mentor is filling that gap in my thoughts and occupying all of my thoughts. I intuit that this mentor has feelings for me but can't be sure - which makes it all the more difficult to endure. The mentor drags on conversations with me when we work together, smiles at me, teases me, touches my hand/arm, remembers all the little things I say... all obvious signs of flirting. Unfortunately, this makes me smile and laugh when almost nothing else is following my trauma. 

I am concerned that either a) my emotions have been messed with recent events, b) I have lost the ability to trust my boyfriend and my feelings for this other man are real, c) I cannot hide from these new emotions given my proximity to this new man and his (presumed) feelings toward me. I'd appreciate some suggestions.
user
Boyfriend broke up with me only to get back together with a mentor of mine; now I
assistant