We started dating freshman year of highschool. We're broken up now. I'm 18 and she is 17. 

I didn't know how much she really meant to me. I'm in a new place and had to say goodbye to all of my friends and family. We broke up a month ago so we could adjust to college and be friends. At the time I thought it was a solid idea. I was sad, of course, but i thought it was for the best. We ended up being placed in the same residence hall only 5 doors down from eachother.

We still talked and things were actually better than when we were dating. But things started changing very quickly. We said we'd spend one more night together when we were both moved in. But when that day came she went out with some new friends. "Raincheck" she said.

I started to lose my mind. I kept hearing stories about her around campus. I asked her about it and she got mad and told me to keep it to myself next time. I lost all control over the situation. I asked her again about spending the night together and she replied with "I don't know." I started pushing the question and eventually crossed the line. She told me it wasnt going to happen now. 

I lost it after that. I consider myself a level-headed person but I went full psycho. I kept sending text after text and by the time I realized what I was doing it was too late. I wanted to take it all back but I couldn't. I was having a meltdown. The next thing I knew, I was laying in bed sobbing with a suicide note in my hand. 

It sounds so immature but I was in that place. The window was wide open and I was ready to just end it. A friend called and I told him about everything. That was 2 days ago but things haven't gotten any easier. How do I fix things? How do I keep myself from getting to that place again? I'm trying to let go but I never realized how much she meant to me.
user
I just lost my mind over a girl I'm still in love with
assistant
We started dating freshman year of highschool. We're broken up now. I'm 18 and she is 17. 

I didn't know how much she really meant to me. I'm in a new place and had to say goodbye to all of my friends and family. We broke up a month ago so we could adjust to college and be friends. At the time I thought it was a solid idea. I was sad, of course, but i thought it was for the best. We ended up being placed in the same residence hall only 5 doors down from eachother.

We still talked and things were actually better than when we were dating. But things started changing very quickly. We said we'd spend one more night together when we were both moved in. But when that day came she went out with some new friends. "Raincheck" she said.

I started to lose my mind. I kept hearing stories about her around campus. I asked her about it and she got mad and told me to keep it to myself next time. I lost all control over the situation. I asked her again about spending the night together and she replied with "I don't know." I started pushing the question and eventually crossed the line. She told me it wasnt going to happen now. 

I lost it after that. I consider myself a level-headed person but I went full psycho. I kept sending text after text and by the time I realized what I was doing it was too late. I wanted to take it all back but I couldn't. I was having a meltdown. The next thing I knew, I was laying in bed sobbing with a suicide note in my hand. 

It sounds so immature but I was in that place. The window was wide open and I was ready to just end it. A friend called and I told him about everything. That was 2 days ago but things haven't gotten any easier. How do I fix things? How do I keep myself from getting to that place again? I'm trying to let go but I never realized how much she meant to me.
user
I'm in something of a breakup, but i'm still in love with my
assistant