I'll try to start from the beginning.  

My fiance and I have been engaged for about 3 years, and have been putting off the wedding until I could finish school.  Originally, my dad [52M] offered to pay for the wedding. (Parents are divorced). Since then, because of some crazy and abusive behavior, my fiance and I have decided to pay for the wedding ourselves, as well as exclude my father and his entire side of the family from the wedding.  This has caused us to put off the wedding until next year.  We were fine with putting the date off until recently.

I work with my mother [52F], and we recently got into a huge argument at work (unrelated issues such as politics), and she completely lost her mind and became incredibly verbally abusive to me (during work hours).  She said some incredibly hurtful things akin to what my father has said in the past, dwelling up some resentful feelings.  One example of something she said was a broad statement of how *her* side of the family thinks very negatively of me, really hurting me.

Because of this, I have now considered excluding her from the wedding as well.  The only way I can think of doing this as painlessly as possible would be to just elope.  (My fiance and I have joked about this before, and he would actually just prefer it anyway).  Am I overreacting?  I have no problems with his family, and they would probably be at whatever small ceremony we would have, as well as friends.  

I am just incredibly hurt by both my parents, and am feeling resentful.  While I have been feeling excited for the wedding for some time now, I am also apathetic because it has taken so long for anything to get remotely close to happening that if it never happened at this point I don't think I would even regret it.  My fiance and I have been living together for a few years now, and really nothing would change in my life other than some legal options anyway.  

side notes: both of my fiance's sisters have had non-traditional, small weddings, so I don't think his family would mind us eloping much.
user
fiance and i have been waiting years to get married; my dad and his family are excluded due to abuse; mom has recently been abusive as well and we are now considering to
assistant
I'll try to start from the beginning.  

My fiance and I have been engaged for about 3 years, and have been putting off the wedding until I could finish school.  Originally, my dad [52M] offered to pay for the wedding. (Parents are divorced). Since then, because of some crazy and abusive behavior, my fiance and I have decided to pay for the wedding ourselves, as well as exclude my father and his entire side of the family from the wedding.  This has caused us to put off the wedding until next year.  We were fine with putting the date off until recently.

I work with my mother [52F], and we recently got into a huge argument at work (unrelated issues such as politics), and she completely lost her mind and became incredibly verbally abusive to me (during work hours).  She said some incredibly hurtful things akin to what my father has said in the past, dwelling up some resentful feelings.  One example of something she said was a broad statement of how *her* side of the family thinks very negatively of me, really hurting me.

Because of this, I have now considered excluding her from the wedding as well.  The only way I can think of doing this as painlessly as possible would be to just elope.  (My fiance and I have joked about this before, and he would actually just prefer it anyway).  Am I overreacting?  I have no problems with his family, and they would probably be at whatever small ceremony we would have, as well as friends.  

I am just incredibly hurt by both my parents, and am feeling resentful.  While I have been feeling excited for the wedding for some time now, I am also apathetic because it has taken so long for anything to get remotely close to happening that if it never happened at this point I don't think I would even regret it.  My fiance and I have been living together for a few years now, and really nothing would change in my life other than some legal options anyway.  

side notes: both of my fiance's sisters have had non-traditional, small weddings, so I don't think his family would mind us eloping much.
user
My fiance and I are considering eloping to avoid a big fight at work, my father is very abusive, and we are hurt by both of our parents. We are also being put
assistant