Hey reddit. I am making a throwaway account since my GF also reddits. So here we go.

My girlfriend and I have been together for just about a year now. Amazing relationship, both extremely in love with each other, and want to spend our lives together. She makes me so extremely happy, and couldn't have found a better partner.

So for the last almost 4 years I've been extremely sick. She has taken me out of the country to get medical treatment, however no doctor has any idea what is wrong with me. I just had a complete physical, and more blood work done Monday. I've seriously had every imaginable test done that I can think of. Now on this visit yesterday my doctor decided to have me checked for STD's, HIV, syphilis, and the works.  For the first time, I started to think and am getting freaked out and cannot sleep or focus.

My girlfriend is my first sexual partner. With all of the tests i have had done over the years, I assumed that STD's were also done. The reason that this has started to worry me is that when I was younger, things happened to me. Its hard for me to type this out right now, I have never told anyone. Growing up, I was molested twice, once when I was 5, and again when I was around 11 or 12. I have pretty much blocked out those memories, and it never occurred to me that I could have an STD. Especially 10 years after the fact that I started getting sick. I am freaking out, and feel nauseated. 

I seriously don't know what to do reddit. I feel like the worst person imaginable if I get a call from my doctor saying I have something like HIV, knowing that my girlfriend would have it as well. I love her and she means the world to me. What should I do. Should I tell her what happened, and the possibility of me having something, or should I wait to hear back from the doctor first? Please help!!! If I do confront her, how would I go about it? I know I can talk to her about anything. But this? This is so hard right now.
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I have
assistant
Hey reddit. I am making a throwaway account since my GF also reddits. So here we go.

My girlfriend and I have been together for just about a year now. Amazing relationship, both extremely in love with each other, and want to spend our lives together. She makes me so extremely happy, and couldn't have found a better partner.

So for the last almost 4 years I've been extremely sick. She has taken me out of the country to get medical treatment, however no doctor has any idea what is wrong with me. I just had a complete physical, and more blood work done Monday. I've seriously had every imaginable test done that I can think of. Now on this visit yesterday my doctor decided to have me checked for STD's, HIV, syphilis, and the works.  For the first time, I started to think and am getting freaked out and cannot sleep or focus.

My girlfriend is my first sexual partner. With all of the tests i have had done over the years, I assumed that STD's were also done. The reason that this has started to worry me is that when I was younger, things happened to me. Its hard for me to type this out right now, I have never told anyone. Growing up, I was molested twice, once when I was 5, and again when I was around 11 or 12. I have pretty much blocked out those memories, and it never occurred to me that I could have an STD. Especially 10 years after the fact that I started getting sick. I am freaking out, and feel nauseated. 

I seriously don't know what to do reddit. I feel like the worst person imaginable if I get a call from my doctor saying I have something like HIV, knowing that my girlfriend would have it as well. I love her and she means the world to me. What should I do. Should I tell her what happened, and the possibility of me having something, or should I wait to hear back from the doctor first? Please help!!! If I do confront her, how would I go about it? I know I can talk to her about anything. But this? This is so hard right now.
user
I have
assistant