I have grown up on the land and realizing being gay was not the most pleasurable experience but at least, i didnt have the worst life. 

However i am soon moving to a bigfer city (yay!) and starting a job there. 

But i have 3 problems:
The first is my insecurity. I would say im kinda chubby. Not fat, but yeah, i am overweight. I was veeery fat when i was 16 but lost quite alot weight after two years, and that gave me alot of confidence! However, seeing that most gays my age tend to be seeming "perfect", thin and so on makes me kinda feel like im not enough for the standard... 

Second, how do i date guys? 
There is one gay youth group i want to attend and want to make friends. I know nobody in this city so im going to some meetups, here and there and try to look if i can find some nice people i get along with. But i also want to start dating but i dont know, would it be ok to ask someone out from a youth group? And more importantly, how/what are good ways to do this? I kinda fear im gonna be the guy who seems desperate because i ask someone out.

Third:
I had one experience with a guy. It was not really a relationship between us, but he hurt me alot and after a long time i realized i was used for sex and as a emotional...trash bin? Well, this guy definetly hurt me alot and i was very negative thinking about relationships in general. This got better over time but to be homest, sometimes i still think somehow negative about trust and so on in a relationship. All in all, im kinda pessimistic about relationships, based on my experiences and some stories here on /r/relationships. 
Maybe someone could give me some insight on this issue? 

Because to be honest, i dont really have anyone to talk to about things like this.
user
im gay, 18/m,moving soon to a big city. I want to make friends/date guys. How do i do this and i also have some issues which are insecurity about my body, how to ask someone out/make friends and negative
assistant
I have grown up on the land and realizing being gay was not the most pleasurable experience but at least, i didnt have the worst life. 

However i am soon moving to a bigfer city (yay!) and starting a job there. 

But i have 3 problems:
The first is my insecurity. I would say im kinda chubby. Not fat, but yeah, i am overweight. I was veeery fat when i was 16 but lost quite alot weight after two years, and that gave me alot of confidence! However, seeing that most gays my age tend to be seeming "perfect", thin and so on makes me kinda feel like im not enough for the standard... 

Second, how do i date guys? 
There is one gay youth group i want to attend and want to make friends. I know nobody in this city so im going to some meetups, here and there and try to look if i can find some nice people i get along with. But i also want to start dating but i dont know, would it be ok to ask someone out from a youth group? And more importantly, how/what are good ways to do this? I kinda fear im gonna be the guy who seems desperate because i ask someone out.

Third:
I had one experience with a guy. It was not really a relationship between us, but he hurt me alot and after a long time i realized i was used for sex and as a emotional...trash bin? Well, this guy definetly hurt me alot and i was very negative thinking about relationships in general. This got better over time but to be homest, sometimes i still think somehow negative about trust and so on in a relationship. All in all, im kinda pessimistic about relationships, based on my experiences and some stories here on /r/relationships. 
Maybe someone could give me some insight on this issue? 

Because to be honest, i dont really have anyone to talk to about things like this.
user
How to date and start dating in a big cities?
assistant