Little back story: This weekend my brother is getting married.  Now, my brother and I haven't always gotten along and lately I have distanced my self even further because his fiance makes him a worse person.  Needless to say I can't stand her either.  

Last night at their rehearsal dinner her father went around the room and asked everyone, "I knew herp and derp were going to get married when ____?" and then put everyone on the spot to answer.  Since I honestly couldn't think of a single nice thing to say I planned to state the obvious in a dick headed way that was meant to say, 'I never thought it would happen'.  When my time came, I stood up and simply said..."I remember the exact moment I realized they were going to get married....It was when he text me and told me they got engaged." Then I proceeded to sit down and return to reading reddit on my phone and being stand offish.  After a brief moment of silence everyone broke out in laughter....Failed....
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My brother and his fiance got engaged while
assistant
Little back story: This weekend my brother is getting married.  Now, my brother and I haven't always gotten along and lately I have distanced my self even further because his fiance makes him a worse person.  Needless to say I can't stand her either.  

Last night at their rehearsal dinner her father went around the room and asked everyone, "I knew herp and derp were going to get married when ____?" and then put everyone on the spot to answer.  Since I honestly couldn't think of a single nice thing to say I planned to state the obvious in a dick headed way that was meant to say, 'I never thought it would happen'.  When my time came, I stood up and simply said..."I remember the exact moment I realized they were going to get married....It was when he text me and told me they got engaged." Then I proceeded to sit down and return to reading reddit on my phone and being stand offish.  After a brief moment of silence everyone broke out in laughter....Failed....
user
Fiance's dad texted my brother that my brother
assistant