I have gotten to know “this guy” over the past year.  After months of dropping hints about his decaying relationship of 4 years and alluding to liking me, we finally admitted we like each other.  However, now that the cat is out of the bag he is hesitant to seal the deal.  He isn’t ready to leave his girlfriend whom he claims he still loves despite their problems, and doesn’t want to begin a side affair with me because he doesn’t want me to feel slighted or used if he has to stop seeing me.  We have intense chemistry, get along great, and at the risk of sounding like a shallow moron – I know I am more attractive than his current girlfriend.  I have never felt so drawn or connected to someone and he has expressed similar sentiments. The smarter part of me knows I should just let it go, but the naïve ass backwards part thinks if I am able to convince him to begin an affair with me, he’ll realize how great it can be and end things with her.  Can you talk some sense into me one way or another?  Either tell me why I’m an idiot, or give me some lame inspirational anecdote so I can forge ahead.  Why would he admit his attraction if he wouldn’t go all the way?
user
He's in an LTR that has fizzled. We have intense chemistry that recently surfaced but he is afraid/hesitant to leave gf. How should I proceed
assistant
I have gotten to know “this guy” over the past year.  After months of dropping hints about his decaying relationship of 4 years and alluding to liking me, we finally admitted we like each other.  However, now that the cat is out of the bag he is hesitant to seal the deal.  He isn’t ready to leave his girlfriend whom he claims he still loves despite their problems, and doesn’t want to begin a side affair with me because he doesn’t want me to feel slighted or used if he has to stop seeing me.  We have intense chemistry, get along great, and at the risk of sounding like a shallow moron – I know I am more attractive than his current girlfriend.  I have never felt so drawn or connected to someone and he has expressed similar sentiments. The smarter part of me knows I should just let it go, but the naïve ass backwards part thinks if I am able to convince him to begin an affair with me, he’ll realize how great it can be and end things with her.  Can you talk some sense into me one way or another?  Either tell me why I’m an idiot, or give me some lame inspirational anecdote so I can forge ahead.  Why would he admit his attraction if he wouldn’t go all the way?
user
Guy I like is hesitant to commit because he wants to be with girlfriend. I know I am better for him than his current girlfriend,
assistant