I have a penpal in a different state that is quite successful with academia and comes from a similar background as me. We were both raised in competitive environments, though the huge difference between him and me is that he flourished throughout his life, and I held myself back with my anxiety and denial. These past years, depression has taken a hold on my life, and I have not told anyone except my superiors - and him, because he didn't know anyone I knew and I wrote it on a whim when I wanted to tell someone.

 I regret this, because I feel like he is judging me. He does not know the whole story (that it originated from serious family issues), and he might think that I self-diagnosed myself with the disorder, therefore dismissing any truth there might be. We have only known each other for a year. I feel it might be silly to seek validation from a person far, far away from me. But I worry that the only person I've ever shared my feelings with is not taking them seriously. He's never actually said anything negative about it once. It's just his relative absence of thoughts or response to it that worries me. He talked a couple of times about how he can relate my experience to some of the experiences of people he knew and once himself (but the latter was actually a very inadequate comparison). But that's all. He's actually a generally very kind, thoughtful person. What's concerning me is that he's never spoken to me about his experiences or feelings, now that I've shared mine. 

 I may be projecting my insecurities onto the relationship. 

I would like to keep the communication and relationship we have, because it's exciting and at times fun, and I'm somewhat estranged from my friends right now. Though I do feel our friendship between us two might not be as strong as I might think it to be at times, and maybe he's more of a stranger than a friend.

I can send him a letter saying I cannot continue communication without an explanation. Or I can send him a letter explaining the reasons why, but I feel like my reasons are petty.
I can send him a letter asking about his thoughts and perhaps divulge more information to clarify my situation.
user
I told my penpal about my depression and now I regret it because I feel he hasn't given me much indication that he's not judging me - and now,
assistant
I have a penpal in a different state that is quite successful with academia and comes from a similar background as me. We were both raised in competitive environments, though the huge difference between him and me is that he flourished throughout his life, and I held myself back with my anxiety and denial. These past years, depression has taken a hold on my life, and I have not told anyone except my superiors - and him, because he didn't know anyone I knew and I wrote it on a whim when I wanted to tell someone.

 I regret this, because I feel like he is judging me. He does not know the whole story (that it originated from serious family issues), and he might think that I self-diagnosed myself with the disorder, therefore dismissing any truth there might be. We have only known each other for a year. I feel it might be silly to seek validation from a person far, far away from me. But I worry that the only person I've ever shared my feelings with is not taking them seriously. He's never actually said anything negative about it once. It's just his relative absence of thoughts or response to it that worries me. He talked a couple of times about how he can relate my experience to some of the experiences of people he knew and once himself (but the latter was actually a very inadequate comparison). But that's all. He's actually a generally very kind, thoughtful person. What's concerning me is that he's never spoken to me about his experiences or feelings, now that I've shared mine. 

 I may be projecting my insecurities onto the relationship. 

I would like to keep the communication and relationship we have, because it's exciting and at times fun, and I'm somewhat estranged from my friends right now. Though I do feel our friendship between us two might not be as strong as I might think it to be at times, and maybe he's more of a stranger than a friend.

I can send him a letter saying I cannot continue communication without an explanation. Or I can send him a letter explaining the reasons why, but I feel like my reasons are petty.
I can send him a letter asking about his thoughts and perhaps divulge more information to clarify my situation.
user
I have a relationship with a stranger who I have not shared my feelings with, should I let him know?
assistant