>

What about passport size?
“Sorry Mum and Dad. I’d love for you to meet my new boyfriend but he’s been deemed too mentally unstable to be on the continent.” >

"He's also just a tiny bit of a Hitler loving Nazi" >

"I really wish he could be here, I came to tell you I think we're ready to take the next goose step together" >

Australian Customs: Do you have a criminal record?
Tourist: No, are they still required? >

I don't care who you are, that's funny right there >

Probably not for the customs agent, after hearing it 100 times a day for 27 years their inner monolog is gonna be "please don't say, please don't say it, FUCK"
*completely stone-faced
"No sir, we no longer require criminal convictions to enter Australia, as a matter of fact we actively discourage it, please have a nice day >

Oh no…. Pls I dont want to hear or talk about Kanye anymore.
Guy is totally irrelevant in the big picture. >

And the small one. >

And the wallet size one