Sentence construction with 除了, 被，一方面 I'm currently studying these sentence constructions and I tried to translate in the best way possible.

in addition to the kitchen, the living room of this apartment is also very large.Only if the surroundings are not too confusing, I will rent it.


除了厨房以外，还这间房子的客厅大
只有周围环境得不太乱， 我才租。

Yesterday I was criticized by my friends: they say that transport there it's more uncomfortable every year.

昨天我被我的朋友批评了:他们说那果的 交通一年比一年不方便


Marco will be back in a quarter of an hour and we will leave at 8 o'clock tonight. He does not like to watch the Beijing opera as much as I do, so when we get to Beijing, he thinks that on one hand to go eat jiaozi, on the other to exercise the spoken language


麦克一刻就要回了，我们今天晚上八点。他没有我那么爱看京剧， 我们到北京去的时候，他觉得一方面去吃饺子一方面练习口语
in addition to the kitchen, the living room of this apartment is also very large.Only if the surroundings are not too confusing, I will rent it.
除了厨房以外，这间公寓的客厅也很大。只要周围不太乱，我就会租下来。


Comments:


还 means 'still', while 也  means 'also'. BTW, in no way you can put 还 in the beginning of the clause like this.
只要...就... 'only if ..., ... will ...'


Yesterday I was criticized by my friends: they say that transport there it's more uncomfortable every year.
昨天我被朋友批评了：他们说那儿的交通一年比一年糟糕。



Comments:


You are supposed to omit possessives when the context is clear.


Marco will be back in a quarter of an hour and we will leave at 8 o'clock tonight. He does not like to watch the Beijing opera as much as I do, so when we get to Beijing, he thinks that on one hand to go eat jiaozi, on the other to exercise the spoken language
麦克再有一刻钟就要回去了，而我们今晚8点才走。因为他不如我喜欢听京剧，所以我们到北京后，他打算去吃饺子，同时练习口语。



Comments:


Use 一刻钟 instead of 一刻 to avoid ambiguity.
in a quarter of an hour -> 还有/再有一刻钟
and ->而
You seems to have missed 'leave'
'So' should be translated into 因为...所以...
It might be confusing but in Chinese, you listen to a play: 听京戏/听京剧
I don't think 'on one hand..., on the other hand' or 一方面..., 另一方面 is appropriate here.