What are the "signs of grief" for which a pastor should be on the look out? So, in my seminary pastoral care class, I remember being taken to a funeral home, and walked through the mechanics of a funeral. During that visit, I was told that "everyone's grief process is different," and I have seen wide variation in this.  I have seen people who have lost sisters and mothers grieve for several weeks and be fine.  I have seen at the upper end four to six months of being seemingly stuck on the loss.

Later (in the same class I should add!), I was admonished that as a pastor, I should be on the lookout for those who are "stuck in grief."  When I pressed on this – namely 'what are the signs that someone is stuck in grief,' I was never given a satisfactory answer.

While the Psalms describe the emotions that many feel when grieving (as well as comfort), are there any lists by classic pastoral care givers (e.g. Thomas Owens, patristic sources, the Reformers, etc... – not just Ms. Kubler-Ross please) of the signs that a pastor should be on the lookout that someone really is "stuck in grief?"
Being stuck in grief is referred to by professionals as "incomplete grief" or "complicated grief."    It is often defined as grief that is not resolving or normalizing within 6 to 12 months after the loss.  

Identifying red flags may include:
* A sense of unrelenting disbelief or numbness
* Intensifying anger, rage, irritability, or agitation
* A preoccupation with distressing thoughts about the death event
* Recurrent or growing pangs of painful emotions with intense yearning and longing for the dead loved one
* Difficulty in relationships, including withdrawal or problems with intimacy
* Avoidance of situations and activities that are reminders of the loved one
* Apathy, giving up, feeling that life has no meaning or purpose
* Severe depression with hopelessness  

This is an amalgamation of various lists which come up on an internet search for "stuck in grief". 

References:
WebMD
Glynis Sherwood Counseling